Burnout At Work: 30 Tips On How To Avoid It & What To Do When You Are In It
Last week I spoke about conscious leadership - and you can still sign up for my International Women's Day Coaching Special for conscious leadership here.
In my view, conscious leadership can help to reduce burnout on a large scale because experiencing burnout can have a lot to do with not feeling heard or with losing a connection to or meaning in work. Conscious leadership has an open ear for that.
Today, we also see that Covid is causing more burnout in people and while in this post I cover burnout at the workplace based on my own experience, the points I list below may still be helpful when the stress caused by covid may lead to your burnout or that of someone you know.
What is burnout?
"A state of physical, emotional, and mental exhaustion caused by long term involvement in emotionally demanding situations."
– Ayala Pines and Elliot Aronson.
"A state of fatigue or frustration brought about by devotion to a cause, way of life, or relationship that failed to produce the expected reward."
– Herbert J. Freudenberger.
These two definitions describe each one significant area of burnout.
The first one talks about the exhaustion that is experienced by the initial commitment, and then an extended period of experiencing stress. The second one talks about the deep end of burnout when we go beyond stress and exhaustion and enter no-hope-land, where the meaning of life fades and we struggle to get out of bed.
That is where I went wrong for many years – I always confused burnout with stress and being overly busy at work. But there is also good stress. There are people who are often busy and "stressed" but it motivates them and it doesn't have to end in burnout. Although, they would still be recommended to slow down and look after their personal health and wellbeing.
But burnout is more than that. Burnout is when you are moving in the (for you personally) wrong direction. Burnout is when what you are doing is not aligned with your highest self or your values.
In that sense, a burnout is a guidepost that tells you to change direction.
One day, I found myself in the office desperate and hopeless and ended up googling burnout because I no longer knew what to do about my situation.
Among the signs of burnout that I found, these were only a few I ticked:
Chronic fatigue
Lack of productivity and decreasing performance
Anxiety
Hopelessness
Apathy & loss of enjoyment
Headaches
Loss of appetite
Sadness
Depression
Irritability
If you are a leader
If you are a leader and you or someone in your team is burning out, don’t brush it under the carpet.
If you are going through it yourself, seek help.
If it is a staff or colleague, learn about conscious leadership, listen, and support generously. There is a human sitting in front of you who is suffering. Read my blog post on conscious leadership here.
I believe with more conscious leaders, we can avoid burnout at the workplace on a large scale. And as you will see in that blog post, conscious leadership has a lot to do with embracing your feminine strengths, deep listening, slowing down and being vulnerable.
16 things you can do every day to avoid burnout (+2 pro-tips)
1) Slow down
Burnout builds on stress. Learn to slow down in your day, in life and work to create a healthy equilibrium. Read my blog post on the importance of slowing down here.
2) Practise gratitude for what you have
Everyone talks about it but by learning to be grateful for what we have, we learn to be more present, happy and, well, grateful. Practice gratitude daily - it can be in a journal or just by savouring the moment. It helps you to build resilience and a positive outlook on life.
3) Build strong relationships in which you know you are heard
Burning out has largely to do with feeling isolated and not feeling heard. Some people are unable to hold space for you. And that is okay - everyone is doing their best at this moment. But build yourself nourishing relationships which you know will be able to hold you in a time of crisis.
4) Meditate or do mindfulness exercises
Meditation and mindfulness practices help ground us in the present moment, in reality. They help build up resilience and help you be more grounded in challenging situations. Learn how to practice mindfulness without meditation or sitting still here.
5) Know your values
Burnout also has to do a lot with not living or working with what feels aligned with us. When we know our values and we make an effort to work and live by them, we live in more alignment. Journal and explore what is important to you in life. Read my post on how to figure out your core values here. I was inspired to write that post by my burnout.
6) Know your non-negotiables
Non-negotiables are not the same as values. Non-negotiable are the things you do in your everyday life that you cannot live without. They are practical, tangible things whereas values are large and abstract concepts. My non-negotiables are moving my body, having time to prepare nourishing or comforting food for me and my partner, spending time with friends, and learning new things. I learned these when I was deprived of them because I was working something like 55 hours - I wasn’t burning out, I was just too busy to do these things.
7) Spend time doing a hobby
It may sound basic, but find yourself a hobby that is not related to work. This is your time to have fun and fill your time with joy. Your hobby may bring you together with like-minded people and you may find a community here, including additional friends and a bigger network that makes you feel held. It may combine a few things of this list, too! One of my big hobbies is bouldering. It brings together moving my body, community, unplugging, and more. But it can also be a creative hobby - expressing yourself, your thoughts and feelings is also crucial for your mental health.
8) Spend time in nature
Always. Spending time in nature is grounding. Do it every day. No excuses. Every time I go for a walk in nature when I feel low, it lifts me up. It brings us back into the present moment and shows us beauty. It makes us see the bigger picture.
9) Take a vacation and unplug
If you can, take a day or more away from home and unplug. Reduce your social media and phone and computer use to a minimum. It will help you connect with yourself, the moment, the people you travel with, the place you travel to, and remind you of what matters. It helps you to see new things - and experiencing novelty is a great way to nurture our happiness levels.
10) Schedule in time-affluence or down-time
You can schedule a time for time-affluence every day. Half an hour. Five minutes. Use that time to do nothing specific or let yourself be spontaneously inspired and drawn to an enjoyable activity. Make it your priority. Related blog posts: 8 Ways To Create More Time In Your Day & The Importance of Slowing Down and REST.
11) Hire a life coach
Obviously, I am a big promoter of that. But it has truly made such an impact on me when I hired a life coach last year - it was just to get me on the right path with my business and to spark my self-confidence. But it has done so much more than that. A life coach can guide you when you feel unaligned, can open your eyes to your unlimited self-worth, hold you accountable, give you tools and support you on your way to becoming their most aligned, true, deep and most compassionate self. That is what I do in my capacity as a life coach.
12) Prioritise your sleep, no excuses
Always. You will hear me talk about slowing down and resting a lot. Because I think it is key to consider it equal to work, both for your physical and mental wellbeing and even longevity. So, sleep. Go to bed earlier than you do now. Read before you sleep to calm your mind. And try to get around 8 hours of sleep each night. (I know several people with severe sleep issues - again, seek help from a doctor or professional. Prioritise your sleep.)
13) Set boundaries
This is hard but crucial. When you know your non-negotiable, values and schedule in time-affluence and downtime and vacation, learn to say “no” and prioritise your sleep – that is you setting boundaries. It is so important for your wellbeing, especially once things are starting to go off-rail. This is what self-care can look like.
A few obvious but nevertheless crucial ones:
14) Schedule in social-media free time
For example, make it a social-media free Sunday, set boundaries and don’t go on social media after 7 pm or before 8 am. Set your phone on silent mode, turn off all notifications, set up non-disturb times in your phone.
15) Move your body every day
It doesn’t have to be “exercise”. Make it walking, set yourself a 10k step goal (I don’t hit them often, but I do yoga daily and boulder weekly).
16) Nourish your body with healthy food
No need to overdo this. There is no need to label yourself, but a range of vegetables of fruit and vegetables everyday, healthy oils, proteins, nuts, seeds, herbs, maybe a little meat or fish. I have found for myself that the simpler and more real the food I eat the better my mood, feeling and digestion.
Pro Tip I: Grow your financial security net at all times
When an unexpected event hits or burnout comes over you, it is bliss to know that you don’t need to have financial worries at least for a while should you leave your job. Save at least 10% of your income in a separate account. There are great books out there on personal finances, like The Barefoot Investor by Scott Pape.
Pro Tip II: Raise awareness about burnout at your work or in your family and with friends
At work, try to talk to a work health and safety committee about burnout. I am still astounded by how many people have contacted me when I shared the story of my burnout. The issue is, it is very common to live through - many people do it - but we may not know how to name our experience because we may not know what burnout is. And others may not be able to help because they don't know what it looks like.
14 things you can do if you are burning out (+1 pro-tip)
1) Keep up your routine to the best of your abilities
Burnout includes a feeling of hopelessness. Work and life may even lose meaning, showering becomes unimportant, depression is a possibility. Try to keep up your routines. A routine us something you can control and having a feeling of control over your own life is essential during this time and for your mental health in general. I struggled immensely to meditate during this time and I skipped as many days as I haven’t in YEARS since I started my daily practice. But I got up at more or less at the same time. And even though I was sad, I did my yoga. I made sure I ate well. I didn’t enjoy creating food, but I made a list of easy healthy meals and stuck it on the fridge so I would stick to it. A routine gives your spirit a sense of control and prevents you from slipping into destructive habits.
2) Create a back-up plan if you can
When you are living through burnout, chances are you are already dreaming about another life, escaping your reality. Go beyond that and try to make it a tangible plan. Write about what you want and what you don’t want. This is where your journalling comes in. What are some doable small things you can do to create a back-up plan? What are you not enjoying right now? Do you need to reduce your hours? Take a vacation? Get away from home for a bit? The thing with burnout is, you can’t push through it. You need to make changes and a plan.
3) Keep building that financial security net
Always save at least 10% of your income. I am a big money saver and when I realised I was doing unwell and the thought that I may quit started to form in my mind, I started to put the percentage of my paycheck that I usually put into house savings, in another account that I called “freedom”. It gave me a sense of control and financial security. I knew I didn’t want to touch my other savings for as long as possible. I started a new savings account just for the circumstance I was in. It was empowering and gave me something to look forward to.
4) Talk to friends about it
Talk to friends you trust, who know are able to hold space for you, who may call you out or make you seek help, friends who you can cry with or rant or just spend time with without feeling judged. Community is everything.
5) Talk to the people involved
This may or may not work and it is important that you gauge the potential outcome. Are you burning out at work? Try to talk to your manager. Are you burning out at home with your partner? Talk with them about it, practice clear and kind communication. Are you burning out financially? Seek help or perhaps talk to your bank to see if they are able to help.
6) Share your story
When I started talking about my experience with burnout and situational depression on Instagram, I didn’t expect anything. I didn’t even know why I did it. But I was shocked and surprised by all the love I received. Old friends reached out to check in with me, people shared that they are going through the same thing, some sent me love and good wishes. It made a HUUUGE difference for me. It made me feel held and seen and heard – and it made me cry of relief. And I am still so grateful that I did it. Because if you are burning out – know that you are not alone.
7) Try to find meaning in your work
Again, this may or may not work. After all, you are possibly burning out because you lost meaning in your work. But try to find some enjoyment in the work you are doing and perhaps you can focus on the parts that do bring you more joy. Perhaps you can talk to your manager and you figure it out together. Sometimes, it only needs a little shift - a move to a different department or a different team. You may not have to quit. You may just be 1% off. You can take an excellent test that tells you your very individual combination of character strengths. Try to find a way to use them at work. You can take the test here.
8) Try to avoid negative people or being negative yourself
This is where I have to admit something I am not proud of. Although people would always giggle and tease me in my past because I hated gossip and I would try to avoid it at all cost and try to make people see the person’s perspective they were gossiping about, I started to seek out gossip before and during my burnout.
A good little gossip with colleagues is helpful to bond and find emotional support at work, and yet I would not recommend it. The hurt that other people went through hurt me and it was stepping on the toes of one of my main core values which may have contributed to feeling unwell at work. It nurtured negative thinking and contributed to my unhappiness.
9) Have a close friend at work
This is what has helped many people to survive stress or burnout at work. Get yourself a buddy - and find topics to talk about other than work!
10) Try to connect and do small acts of kindness
When I was feeling very unwell and I couldn’t get myself happy again, I tried to give some kindness to others. That did cheer me up a little bit - more than my other self-care tricks did.
11) Analyse the situation, take radical responsibility for your own happiness
Unfortunately, there is usually not another person who will do this for you. So, you may have to do this on your own or take initiative for it on your own - you can ask friends to help you, of course, but unless you are reaching your absolute limit, others may not notice how you feel or what to do about it. Practice awareness and remember, this is your life and you deserve the best life.
12) Make a decision
One day, I remembered a quote by Albert Einstein:
“Doing the same thing everyday an expecting different outcomes is the definition of insanity”.
So, I wrote down all the areas in my life that were making me unhappy. Shockingly, there were a number of areas, not just one. At the time, I couldn’t pin down exactly what the issue was (we can be innocently blind to our own reality).
I knew I wanted to feel different and therefore had to make a decision and a radical change. I went through each of the areas of my life I had written down and listened inward to hear in which one I needed to or want to make a change. In the end, I had boiled it down to my job. My dissatisfaction with work had crept into other areas of my life, but I knew that making a change there will improve the other areas again. At first, I decided to reduce my hours. But my final breakdown showed that this wasn’t enough. I (I should say “we” because my partner helped me) decided to quit. And I never looked back.
13) See a doctor or counsellor
Definitely see a doctor. When I walked into the clinic and we did a few tests, the GP told me I was at extremely high risk for depression and anxiety and handed me a list of psychologist and made sure to see me again to make a health plan. At that time, my decision to quit had already healed me though, but I promised the doctor to continue seeing my counsellor. Sometimes we feel bad about taking a day off sick even if we are unwell. A doctor can analyse your situation from a professional viewpoint and may even help you understand the seriousness of it. My doctor certainly made me even more worried than I was before I made my big decision to quit. She was the first person to properly believe me and see my struggle. We may appear tough and strong, even when we struggle because it is daunting to show vulnerability.
14) Seek help
You are not going to get through this alone. You don’t have to and you won’t efficiently. Allow others to help and hold you.
Pro-Tip: Hydrate
The sleeping issues you may have because of burnout – you may develop insomnia or (like me) sleep and nap endlessly without ever being rested – are very likely to impact your level of being hydrated.
“In a study of nearly 20,000 adults in both the United States and China, people who slept only six hours per night were found to have significantly higher rates of dehydration than people who slept eight hours.” (sleepfoundation.org)
And vice versa, dehydration can cause increased fatigue. That said – I looked up the science only after my burnout. But I noticed for myself that I constantly had an extremely dry mouth and that I was constantly thirsty during my burnout. Remember it is all interconnected. You are a system, a wonder of nature, a universe. One change in life will bring along a chain of reactions.
I really hope this shines some light on your questions. What I recommend is taking action as soon as you can hear your mind, body, or soul react. You don’t need to wait for a big breakdown. Take action now. See a doctor, seek help, make changes to your status quo, find out what you want and need and move into that direction of alignment.
Let me know in the comments if this resonates with you and what your biggest take away is!
