Why I Decided To Become A Coach
Sometimes, life can bring the most amazing and fulfilling changes, even if the way there is not always easy. But what I have learned is that when we start playing bigger or start getting closer to the edge of the circle around us that encircles our comfort zone - that I when things get juicy. We feel resistance and blocks coming up. Our inner critic starts doubting us or explaining why we can’t do certain things. And fears come up.
We may think that all this is bad, or we think it is all true, or we think it is not important. But, in fact, that is what is untrue.
Because when we experience fear, blocks and resistance, that is when we have a chance to dive really deep and break through. By questioning our fears and using our blocks as stepping stones, we may just reach freedom and lightness.
It can be hard to break through them, and sometimes it is scary to open up old wounds just to explore what the resistance we feel about projects is trying to tell us, but it is where the magic happens.
And it is the kind of magic that I decided to facilitate for others – as a life coach.
My own transition
It all started with me successfully ignoring my intuition and my inner mentor who knew that what I was doing wasn’t feeling good…
In 2010 I joined my first 10 day-silence meditation retreat and immediately recognised the feeling of home, flow, belonging. I wanted to spend my life doing work that fulfilled me and guided others into this splendid feeling of bliss and love and peace.
But I doomed it an impossible quest and stuffed the thought to the back of my mind. I decided to stay in my comfort zone. But luckily I took the meditation practice with me wherever I went.
After 7 years of studying literature and languages, living in 5 countries, and meeting hundreds of wonderful people, I tried myself in jobs and work that felt like a logical follow-up to what I had studied. During university, it was easy to pick up more random jobs, but once I finished my studies, things started to feel serious …
Then in 2017, I read Tara Mohr’s book Playing Big - which I highly recommend reading. That is when I heard my inner voice for the first time in a long time and it whispered, I want to work with mindfulness and happiness.
But again, I ignored the calling as I had finally semi-managed to commit myself to translation. I worked in that field now, self-employed, reading and learning all about it, and then landing an amazing job in the field.
I had even started a blog on my translation website. But wait - it was about how to practice mindfulness as a translator.
Mh.
And my business was called Mindful Translations.
Mh. Mh.
(How blind we can be to the obvious sometimes.)
So, yes I can say, that it all started with me, well, semi-successfully ignoring my intuition and my inner mentor who knew that what I was doing wasn’t the correct thing for me…
So that in March 2020, I started becoming extremely unhappy with my 9-5. I was sitting in a windowless corner of the office, wondering, how I got there. I had always been this free spirit, but some subconscious fears had led me to believe that this is what I SHOULD be doing. Yikes! (You can read more about my turbulent 2020 in this post.)
But then, Corona hit and we all began working from home, which is when I started a new blog on mindfulness and happiness. That’s this very blog! I immediately loved it. Again. The writing part, the research part, all of it. Writing about topics I knew, topics I had practised for 10 years, topics that fascinated me to the core, topics I felt drawn to in all the books I had been reading for the past few years! I was feeling fulfilled, and writing and learning about the two topics I have been, oh, so passionate about for, oh, so long. I decided to stick to it this time.
And yet, I didn’t dare to make a change to my 9-5 and to take the obvious steps toward my own happiness. It was too scary.
I had gotten comfortable and afraid of change.
That is, until I had a pretty ugly burnout. My spirits, my body and my mental wellbeing felt crushed, just shut down completely and I was ridden by fear, depression and angst. But (thank god! — Read this with a slightly sarcastic voice) I had a final disastrous breakdown to really drive home the message.
But apparently, I needed that in order to actually make the needed change to save my physical and mental health. I decided to get out of this job. I made the decision, I saw it through with as much grace as I could gather, filled up my internal glass to.the.brim with good hopes and optimism, and made my passion for mindfulness and happiness my work.
Now? Everything is different. My depression? Puff!! Disappeared. My lack of direction? Gone. My enthusiasm and love for life? Reborn. My purpose? Found. My peace and presence in the moment? Rebuilt.
And amongst it all - coaching
And in the process of all that, I discovered coaching for me. That is THE profession that guides others through exactly such transformative changes, and through inner and outer work on the self.
I myself worked with a life coach last year – before my burnout started taking shape – and the work that I got done with her and what I found out through this encounter was absolute gold. Then, during one of my sessions, the penny dropped.
This is what I wanted to do. This – what I was experiencing in that very moment – I wanted to offer others. I understood that I wanted to facilitate transitions and breakthroughs for others, seeing them for their wholeness where they may struggle seeing it. But at the core, we are all love. That is what I desire to show you.
One could say that my life so far has been an experiment. I have worked, travelled, started many projects, seen some of them through, and most of all learned sooooo much on the way. I have read hundreds of books in the mindfulness, happiness, and self-development spaces, attended embodiment conferences and silent meditation retreats, explored myself through meditation, movement, counselling, coaching, personality tests, journalling, travelling, and more. (In Human Design terminology, you may say that was my 3rd line. In Enneagram language it may just be my personality of the Enthusiast. You can learn more about the benefits of taking personality tests here.)
And now, I feel ready to give back.
When I left my job at the end of December 2020, I shared about it on social media and that is when I realised even more that I am not the only one doubting their status quo.
I received so many messages from people saying that I am their inspiration, that I am brave, that they are waiting to have the same courage.
Because many people are looking for a different way of life.
For a deeper connection to themselves and their life.
For more meaning and purpose and belonging in a digitally dispersed and fast world.
Many people are YEARNING for a way of doing things differently. (Especially women – since we are awakening in a world that was mainly "shaped and built" by men.)
And we are, indeed, in a process of finding those new ways.
You are not alone
You, too, may be looking for a way to be happier and live a life that is more meaningful for you. I feel you.
Everyone wonders at times, what’s the meaning of all this? What’s the meaning of life? Well, my take on that is that the purpose of it is living this unique human experience fully by being in the moment and experiencing joy.
For that, we sometimes need to do scary things. Like quitting a job. Or standing still.
And with that we sometimes need help. Or a push. Or a coach. A guide. And a plan.
Since December, I have received more messages from a few people telling me they are now on their new adventure, too: living their life according to their rules and dreams.
Isn’t that fantastic?
I get so lit up by creating and seeing positive change and insights in others.
Remember that no matter how you feel or where you're at right now, creating a sense of deep happiness, peace and presence is absolutely possible.
A word of truth
Since honesty is one of my core values, I do need to share something openly, though.
While mindfulness and happiness are two of my main areas of work, they cannot be chased or found somewhere in the future.
The thing is that they only exist right here. Right now. As you are reading this. The potential for your happiness and presence always exists only in the present moment.
You can have planned this moment in the past. But it can only exist now.
But in order to see and experience the potential for happiness and presence in your every moment, and your own inherent and full value, there are a number of things I can help you do:
finding clarity around your vision, awareness around your blocks, fears and resistance and create a plan for aligned action toward your goal
diving deeper into your self-awareness
introducing practices into your life that enhance your happiness and mindfulness through meditation, embodiment work, and activities that have been proven to be effective by centuries of spiritual journeys – and now science, too
creating an environment that allows you to experience deep happiness and mindfulness more easily and readily
working on your mindset, mind-body alignment, emotional mastery
slowing down (and seeing the value of it)
creating a time and energy sustainable approach and plan for your life and work
True change can only happen through awareness - acceptance - aligned action.
We need to go beyond reading and consuming information, which often keeps us in our comfort zone and nearly acts like a form of noble procrastination.
The real work lies beyond that.
And yet, the answers to all your questions are not to be found outside of you. They are within you. It is just a matter of finding them.
And that is why I decided to become a coach.
Coaching is unlocking a person’s potential to maximise their own performance. It is helping them to learn rather than teaching them.
John Whitmore, in Coaching for Performance.
Over to you! What is a recent transition you have been going through lately?
